Monday, 19 December 2011

Bhagatji learns driving!!

Mr.Bhagat is my protaganist,my new -old age hero..You might not have seen anyone like him.Such men are not made anymore.
A man of blunt honesty ,family values;highly intelligent,quick,innovative,creative mind ,a good sense of humour .All that he lacked was the sense of worldy wisdom.I sometimes wondered and wanted to educate him with some cleverness and shrewd cunningness.

The incident on my mind is when I got a fortunate chance to see his driving skills,I mean if there were any.

At that time he was a man of thirty -seven .You must be wondering why the hell  didn't he learn to drive till that age.The reason was simple.Mr.Bhagat lived in a world of ideologies.

Ideology No-1:Live a simple life.What simple meant was travelling by autos,buses and metros no matter how much you suffer everyday.(Atleast someone should think of the Mother Earth.)

Idelogy No-2:Keep yourself busy.Busy meant sleeping on weekends,eating a completly unhealthy food and listening to old Hindi film songs and living by them.(Muflisi me maza hai:there is pleasure in being poor.)

Ideolgy No-3:Be different( whatever it may mean).He could argue for anything that he believed in..If people are learning to drive cars at the age of 18 or 20 ,why should he?? 

So enough of a good introduction of my hero-Mr.Bhagat.
Being a Copywriter by proffession ,he lived a busy life .As he started earning quite early in the ninety-ninetees when he just passed out of college(he did English (hons) from Delhi University,)he didn't get a fair chance to learn driving.He was hardly twenty one at that time .He would take DTC buses ,(autos when getting late after the late night shifts).He was quite a genius in creating ads.

Remember the polo ad (the mint with the hole)All due credit to him.The frooti ad(Mango frooti,fresh and juicy)It still resounds in my ears.
What I mean to say is that professionally he was awesome.He went on climbing the ladder of success but never got free time to learn driving.

Mr.Bhagat finally decided to learn driving when he was on a break from his over busy schedule after fifteen years of working nonstop.He owned two cars,two houses and a good bank balance by that time.  He never bothered to learn driving because he always had a chauffer.Once the chauffer left for a break just when he was on one,he finally decidedto try his hands on it.

I just happen to be a good neighbour and a childhood friend.I couldn't do much professionally (I'm a lower divisional clerk in a government school) but I learnt driving ten years back when I bought my first Maruti 800.

So that morning I was coming from my morning walk when I saw him returning from driving classes.I was a witness to his recent classes and was genuinly grateful at the fact that his good sense had prevailed and finally he was taking it up.He shook hands and sweetly said,"Amit yaar,You know its been a week that I have learnt driving ,could you let me practise on your Maruti 800 which you don't use anymore.You see I don't want to ruin my new D'Zire.As I have a Hyundai I10 also , I agreed quite happily.
There came another request,"Could you please sit with me?Won't you help your brother like old friend?"I agreed again.

We sat down :he on the driving seat of my old Green Maruti and I beside him.I told him to start the car.But where were the keys?"But you just opened it?,"I said confidently.He fiddled in his trouser pockets and looked inside the car if he had made them fall.They weren't there.After much of a hunt Mr.Bhgat realized that the key was hanging outside at the car door.How funny ,I thought  taking condescending pleasure in my superiority but was quite unaware of what was to come next.

After a series of trials ,the car finally started."How is the gear put?,"he enquired.I told him that it has to be in the neutral and then shifted to the left above.He did that and the car made a cacophonic sound.
 Wondering why I asked him if he had put his foot on the clutch."Yes ,"he said but I noticed that he also had put his right foot on the accelerator simultaneously.
My car was in trouble.No matter how old my greenie was ,I was still in love with her,afterall it was my first love.
Anyway, finally we were out of the society gate and turned left.I was giving him clear and loud instructions to save my life and his.
"Our life was in danger",was the only thing on my mind.Suddenly I noticed a small tempo coming towards us with a sneering smile.I told Bhagatji,"Yaar Bhagat ab slow karke ,second gear me daal le gaadi ,aur is tempo ko pass karne de".
"I don't know how to come back to the secong gear from the third one."The tempo was almost there .When I looked through the corner of my eyes,I turned stone-still.I didn't know what to do.I shouted in his ears ,"Hey tu break maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrr."

The noise of mirror cracking pierced my ears like a dart.But the tempo had gone .Then why was there this crashing sound??? I noticed that a Santro was behind  us and had smashed my sweetie due to sudden stop by us.
Mr.Bhagat quickly came down and apologised to the Santro driver."Thankfully it is a lady who would not indulge in  a road rage murder,"I thought.
I heaved a sigh of relief and listened to what Bhagat had to say:"This man is new learner ma'am.I was teaching him how to pull a break in emergency situations.It all happened because I wanted to teach him how to drive.The lady made a face and called up someone."

She might be calling a relative or her husband ,I thought,After fifteen minutes of silent wait I saw a police gypsy arrive with a tall policeman shouting ,"Haan darling.key baat ho gayi ??kaunsa sai jisne meri daarling santro ki headlight todi hai?"

Mr.Bhagat pointed at me"Ji sarkaar, yeh Maruti Amit Mishra ji ki hai.Mujhe to driving aati bhi nahi."

1 comment: